IDOL NEWS

Idol was a shocker. I was NOT expecting to see Chris go. I don't really care for him, but I thought he would either win or be the runner up.
My favorites have always been Taylor and Katherine.
I liked Mandisa too, but I didn't think she would win because she was a large girl and a lot of people are prejudice against that.

All I can say is this...

IF Elliot the Leprechaun wins, then I will not watch next year!!!!

FLOWERS, BUGS AND CANOES

Over the weekend during the free time we had in between games, I walked the facility that the baseball team stayed at. It was beautiful. I could have taken a million pictures, but Todd was walking around with me and he was being patient with me, so I didn't want to push my luck.

Here are some of the things I found (my favorites) from my mini hike.


OF COURSE, this last one is my favorite. I took about 20 shots of this one and the grasshopper just sat there like he was on the Red Carpet or something!!!!

NATURE IS SO BEAUTIFUL!!!! I can't wait to have the opportunity and time to do this again! I REALLY should try to take pictures at least one weekend out of the month for things I want to capture. Plus it is very relaxing and helps me forget about the world happening around me.

Please let me know what you think!

ON THE LIGHTER SIDE...

Let's get back to me in this lifetime.

My weekend was great and stressful all in the same. To sum it up, we had a baseball tournament this past weekend here in our area. For once in a long time we didn't have to travel anywhere. The team came to us!!! (Austin plays on a tournament team from a town 3 hours away and we usually have to do the traveling).
I set the team up at a very nice, private place here in our town that I never even knew existed. I found it on the internet!! WOW..what a trip!!!
ANYWAY - It was beautiful. Instead of a hotel, the kids were free to run around like crazy while not playing games. They didn't have to worry about being quiet and not running due to the fear of being to loud and bothering other guests. IT WAS GREAT!!!!!

Stressful part was the actual games. I always weird out when they play because of obvious reasons. It's competitive ball and we want to win. Of course that should be the way it works right???? Well needless to say, that was not the way it worked this time. Some of the kids acted as though they had never picked up a baseball before. VERY STRESSFUL when you have some that want to be there and do their best. It was heartbreaking!!!!! Maybe they just wanted to be back at the cabin having a fun time fishing, hiking and so forth that they forgot the reason they were here!
They actually placed 3rd, but could have won the whole thing if they would have tried!!!!

Here is a picture that I took of Austin while on 3rd base working on stealing home.

Here is another picture that I took of him sitting in the dugout while they batted. He was actually sitting with a buddy and they are both in the picture, but I cropped it so you could see his eyes. I love the way they look in this picture.
HE'S JUST SO DANG BEAUTIFUL TO ME!!!!

You all know that he didn't get that eye color from me. That is his daddy made over!!!!

MY LIFE STORY. WOULD YOU READ IT IN THE HARDBACK VERSION?

I actually think that if anything bad will happen, then it will happen to me because it always has!
Maybe I have grown up enough to know that bad shit really does happen to good people. I use to be so naive when I was younger and I, just like millions of other people, always thought “that could never happen to me”. Boy was I wrong!!!! Little did I know growing up that those “bad” things were happening or was going to happen and I was stupid enough to think they were normal. I owe to my grandmother a thank you for attempting to shield me from all of the bad and she tried her best, but she could only do so much.
I now realize that the life I led was NOT normal. Some of the things I faced in my childhood and teen years are hardships most families experience only a couple of during their lifetime.
I guess that’s why I am the way I am. I take things with too much ease when people complain about their lives because I think they could be in a hell of a lot worse shape!
~ I don’t freak out over mice because I grew up with RATS!
~ I don’t freak out over roaches because we had the monster ones that could fly.
~ Spiders… stomp them, don’t scream and run!
~ Clothes get dirty, wash them… in your fancy washer, we had a wash tub and ringer and a clothes line!!!! We didn’t get a real set until I was around 10 and still couldn’t use the dryer because it used too much electricity.
~ Toilet stopped up? OK, I lived without indoor plumbing half my childhood and some of my teen years. Imagine being 6 or 7 and having to walk in the dark in the middle of the night to go potty in an outhouse with just a flashlight!
~ Hate going to the grocery store? I used to have to help in the fields and pick vegetables and shuck or shell them, clean and store.
~ I’ve picked cotton…have you? (I’m only 32 years old!)
~ Family member get drunk at a function and embarrass you? I lived with several alcoholics my entire life that embarrassed and scared me on a daily basis.
~ Dad yell at you for staying out too late? Be thankful you have one. I’ve never met mine, but he is alive and knows I exist!
~ Pissed off at a sibling for taking/wearing something of yours? I have a sister that I’ve never met and would love to be able to!
~ Did you ever get to spend quality time with your mother? I did, during my monthly visits while she was in prison for 7 years and then later when she was released.

Aww man, I could go on and on and on and on but… I will say that my childhood and teen years were not all roses, but thorns. I have done everything in my power to make my life as normal as possible since I married. I have also tried to forget about what now seems like a totally different persons life, but how in the hell does a person get over shit like that????? I battle with these feelings of my childhood all of the time and I know that I should be over it, but it’s hard when I have done my best to make myself a better person because of my past. But yet I feel that I’m snake bit and I am to be punished for the rest of my life for some reason. I vowed to myself and followed through to make sure none of that bad stuff would be a part of my life as an adult, to try to be as normal as possible, but I keep getting knocked down in different ways. It’s like God is playing some cruel joke on me. OK, you changed your life and made sure you didn’t fall into the same web as your family, but I’m going to throw wrenches at you for the rest of your life to make sure you’re awake???? Why can’t I have a happy, HEALTHY life???? Why do I usually feel when I get two steps ahead I get pulled 8 steps back???? Is he testing my faith to see if I will stray? Is he telling me to count my blessings and deal with what he has given me? I do realize that there are people in this world that have suffered more than me, but I’m not sure I can handle much more! I guess time will tell!

I have joked many times that I would like to write a book. I wonder if anyone would read it…hmmm????

All of the following has been in my life and immediate family so tell me…

Poverty. Teen Pregnancy. Abandonment. Adoption. Alcoholism. Drugs. Prostitution. Shop Lifting. Child Molestation. Child Pornography. Prison. Spousal Abuse. Divorce. Murder.
PLUS MORE!!!!!!

…do you think my life would make for a good read??????

Better yet, maybe I will pitch it to Lifetime and make it a movie of the week!

WHY DO I DO THESE THINGS TO MYSELF??????

I have been watching a lot of the Animal Cop shows lately. I have come to the conclusion that I need to stop!!!! The more I watch, the more I cry and get pissed off! It just amazes me at how cruel people can be to animals. Why do people get animals they know they can’t take care of? Or why do they get them just to mistreat them? I realize that some people get animals with good intentions, but if they realize they can’t take care of them, then why don’t they give them to someone who can instead of leaving them to starve and die??? What also is sad is that a lot of times Animal Control can’t prove who the owners are and no one can be punished for it. WHY, WHY, WHY???

(It seems that the older I get the easier it is for me to cry. I can watch a damn commercial or read an email and tear up! What the hell!!!! What has happened to me? I use to NEVER cry, especially over something on TV. You would think I was suffering from post pardon depression or something.)